Just because we are made of “everything nice” doesn’t mean everything goes that way. Today, us girls have pressure crushing us from all sides: parents, school, boys, society, social media, friends, and ourselves. But sometimes, we get tired of pushing against them all. A girl can only handle so much.
I’m not an expert, but I am a girl. I hope that what I’ve learned so far can help all of you gorgeous girls to keep pushing on.
1. We are all human.
My best friend Jenna always reminds me of that; it’s kinda her own little motto. I love that she is my BFF because she couldn’t be more right. We are all human. Ladies, let’s give ourselves a break. Now I’m not saying that this makes it okay to do whatever the heck we want, but it does explain:
why we mess up sometimes. why we get angry at others. why we cry in the middle of the night. why we don’t know which direction to take. why we get lonely. why we do things we regret. why we fail classes. why we don’t look like models. why we are late sometimes. why we spend too much money. why we get annoyed at people. why we break.
It explains a lot of things, but I have a feeling you already know what I am talking about. We’ve all been there. Humans aren’t supposed to be perfect, and neither are you.
2. Imperfections are important.
The person you are, the scars you have, the mistakes you’ve made, the roads you’ve traveled, the places you’ve been, the struggles you face, and the bundle of flaws you carry with you are so important. Why?
They are proof you are not alone. Your imperfections allow you to connect to others. If you don’t believe me, listen to the words of C. S. Lewis,
“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: What! You too? I thought I was the only one.”
Not only are friendships formed, but you gain a deeper knowledge and compassion to something that most people would never be able to understand. The trials and heartbreak you go through builds you into a stronger woman. You become a woman who can support and comfort others. A woman who has battled and survived. A woman who is not perfect and that’s okay. And none of us women are alone in this fight.
3. Miserable is good.
WHAT. Yes, I really just said that. Actually, I first read it in the book Desire by John Eldredge. He says,
“[Her] miseries are [her] ally; they urge [her] on.”
Think about that for a sec. If you didn’t feel miserable where you are at, wouldn’t you just…stay there? Maybe it’s a bad relationship or a sucky job. Without being miserable, you might never move on to meet your future husband or land an interview at your dream job. Sweet girl, if you feel miserable right now, it’s most likely because this isn’t where you are supposed to stay. There is something better than this out there for you. Let your misery urge you on. The Greek word for urge is encourage. So in a way, misery is saying, “Keep on fighting!” “Don’t stop here!” “There are better things ahead!” I never thought I’d say this but I couldn’t agree with misery more.
4. You were made to be loved.
It’s a fact: All humans are made to love and be loved. Researchers say that love is just as vital to our survival as food and water. Gosh, no wonder we dream of weddings, fairytales, and prince charmings. It’s laced into our DNA. But here’s the problem,
“We accept the love we think we deserve.”-Stephen Chbosky
Listen to me, you all deserve the truest of love. And you don’t have to do anything for it. There is nothing more you need to prove. Nothing more you need to do. Girls, did we forget that we are meant to be treasured and cherished and cared for? We are supposed to be protected and fought for and sought after. I want to leave you with the closest definition of love I can find,
“Love never gives up. Love cares more for others than for self. Love doesn’t want what it doesn’t have. Love doesn’t strut, Doesn’t have a swelled head, Doesn’t force itself on others, Isn’t always “me first,” Doesn’t fly off the handle, Doesn’t keep score of the sins of others, Doesn’t revel when others grovel, Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth, Puts up with anything, Trusts God always, Always looks for the best, Never looks back, But keeps going to the end. Love never dies.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (MSG)
Please do not accept love that doesn’t measure up to this. You are too valuable to have anything less.
We are sugar and spice. Good days and bad days. Just remember that bad ones don’t mean that you are any less sweet.